The Truth Lies Behind The Mask
by Jellicle
Summary: Dean is sick and Sam doesn't know what to do. They end up in a familiar city to Dean, and Sam has a chance to learn about what he hides behind his strong façade. New chapter up.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimers: No, I don't own Supernatural, or the Winchester brothers. I wish I did. This is a work of fiction written by a fan of the show. The show belongs to WB, the producers and others.

Notes: This is my first Supernatural fanfiction. I started writing CSI and LOCI fictions a few years ago, then I fell in love with Chris Perry Halliwell and his personality, drama and crusade. That led me to write a lot of Charmed fics, and read a lot, too. Oh, and find great friends on the way. I have two Chris wip fics I'm not being able to write. Sorry. Right now I'll trying to get a go with this since this idea has been ranging in my mind for two weeks now, I think.

Important: English is not my native language and this story was not beta-ed so forgive my mistakes. I'll try harder next time.

This is a work in progress, but I know where it will lead to, I just don't know the "in between", as usual. This first chapter is short because I was supposed to be studying for my presentation tomorrow. Literature, I love literature, but I don't like presentations. I hope you like it, and please, review letting me know your opinion.

Thanks for the attention, now on to the story.

**The truth lies behind the mask**

Writer: Stony Angel

Rating: PG-13, just to be on the safe side

Genre: Drama, a little Angsty.

Reviews: Yes, please.

Summary: Sam learns what is behind his brother's mask of arrogance.

**Chapter 01**

Everything has its first time, this was an old saying Sam heard a lot during his life and he knew that was the truth. The only thing that he never thought was that he would one day see his brother like he was seeing right now.

Dean Winchester had a high fever, but continued driving. They passed by two small motels but he didn't stop. Sam thought his big brother was being too stubborn for his own good but Dean wouldn't stop driving. When they finally hit the next small town, the oldest Winchester brother drove between streets until he found what he was looking for. They parked in front of a hotel that looked quite nice, well, way nicer than the others they've been staying lately, Sam thought.

"Now, go. Get us a room," the feverish young man said to his brother.

Dean waited inside his beloved Impala while his baby brother checked in. Sam was soon back with the keys for their room and helped the shorter man to the room, although Dean didn't want help, or didn't want to look like he needed help.

Watching from his office window, the manager of the place waited until the two men went inside then he took the phone and dialed.

"Hey, sheriff, it's me. You were right. The boy is here."

After listening for a moment, the manager, a man on his forties, short sandy blond hair helping him look easy to like, he said "Okay, I'll be waiting." He turned off the phone and glanced once more to the door that closed behind the two brothers. Sighing, he turned and focused came back on his work.

* * *

"Man, you look like crap!" Sam looked at his brother in disbelief. Inside, he was really angry with himself. He was so focused on his problems that he didn't notice how bad his big brother was. Sam wanted to kick himself, "we should have stopped in the previous town, I should have taken him to a hospital" he continued thinking to himself. On his face, the youngest Winchester just tried to keep a brave face, the same brave face his brother keeps to him every single time Sam needs. "I'm gonna go buy some stuff, okay? I'll be back soon."

Dean mumbled something from under the pillow that was covering his face. He was exhausted. And now he felt like he could rest. Dean had been driving out of instinct because his senses were not that reliable, but the moment he hit the town, he knew he was in the right place. He knew that now he could relax. He was safe, for now. But most importantly, Sam was safe as well.

* * *

A little later, Samuel Winchester was back to the hotel carrying a few bags full of necessities, as Dean called the basics.

"Hey, Dean, how are you…" the question died in the brunette's lips as soon as he entered the room – Dean was not there. Sam quickly went to check the bathroom, but again, no sign of Dean. The black Impala was there but no sign of Dean. Worried, Sam walked to the reception of the hotel, and found the clerk busy with his duties.

"Excuse me, Sir," the boy cautiously approached, "I was wondering if you saw my brother. He isn't in our room and he is very sick."

Looking up at him, the clerk said with a sugary smile on his face, "he left with the sheriff."

tbc


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimers: See chapter 1

Author's notes; I hope you don't get too disappointed with this chapter. This is my typical kind of writing, and after all these wonderful reviews I got worried that I wouldn't live up for the expectation. If this doesn't work out I can always try again, right?

I want to thank everyone who reviewed, and a special thanks to one of my favorite reviewers, and writers, **Teal Lover**. Honey, you know my style so you can imagine what is on store. Drama, drama, drama. Let's just say Dean is kind of a new Chris for me – but no one will ever take Chris' place, that's for sure. Dean is conquering his own space.

Again, sorry for my English. This was not beta-ed, so all mistakes are mine.

Thank you for taking a look at this. I hope you enjoy it.

Cheers.

The truth lies behind the mask

Chapter 2

"What? Why?" Sam didn't know what to say. Dean was arrested? The brunette suddenly felt extremely guilty. If he hadn't left his brother alone, this wouldn't have happened. In a matter of milliseconds all the times when Dean didn't leave him alone and saved him again and again played in the young man's mind and Sam felt the urge to smack himself.

Keeping the smile on his face, the clerk pointed with his head to the officer who was standing near them. Sam was so worried that he didn't see the man there. "Officer Tailor will take you to your brother." Breathing deeply to control the anger, Sam finally nodded and followed the man, relieved that there were no handcuffs around his wrists.

The ride to the police station was silent. Well, it wasn't like Sam didn't want to know what happened to his brother but he didn't feel like talking to that stranger. His mind was too focused on Dean. His big brother was sick. His big brother needed him and Sam failed. The already guilty mind of the young Winchester got him so lost that he didn't notice when they parked in front of the station.

The moment the officer stopped the engine, though, Sam pulled out of the car and practically ran inside.

* * *

Dean opened his eyes and welcomed the dark. He thanked the higher power who brought him there and kept the lights off. The familiar scent in the room and the softness of the mattress almost drove him back to sleep, but then a thought that had been trying to fight its way to his conscience finally surfaced and made him jump upward: "Sammy!" In that moment someone entered the dark room, rested a hand in his chest and calmly led him back to lie down in the bed. "He is coming, don't worry. He'll be here soon. Now, you need to rest." Reassured by that, Dean drifted of to sleep again.

* * *

As he entered the station, Sam looked around. He expected the officer to come after him, but it didn't happen. A person approached him and asked if he needed any help. Breathless, Sam asked to talk to the sheriff.

"Oh, you must be the one he is waiting for. Follow me, please."

Sam followed the young officer, probably a rookie, Sam thought. The kid looked younger than Sam, although he knew the guy wasn't probably that young, though.

The door to the sheriff's office was opened and Sam cautiously stepped inside. Behind a desk was a man around his fifties, with salt and pepper hair and a very trustful expression. The man rose from his seat and extended his hand as greeting.

"Sam Winchester, it is a pleasure to see you." Sam shook the man's hand as he eyes the man suspiciously. "I'm Scott Curtis."

Sam, who is usually the most collected of the two brothers, wasn't able to hold his emotions anymore. "Where is my brother? What did you do to Dean?"

"Please, sit down." The sheriff offered the chair in front of him, but Sam had no intention to sit down. "Where is my brother? Is he in jail? He is sick, he needs a doctor."

"Sammy, your brother…"

"It is Sam!" The young brunette split before he even realized.

"Okay, sorry. Listen, Sam, your brother is being taken care of. Don't worry."

"Who are you?" Sam's suspicions were growing although he somehow felt that he could trust the man in front of him. Shaking his head as to clear his thoughts, Sam asked again, "where is Dean."

Scott ran his hand over his short hair and breathed deeply and slowly. Stubbornness seemed to be a Winchester trait that all men got, by the look of it. And just like Dean, the boy in front of him had a little problem with listening.

"I said Dean is okay, he is safe but he needs to rest. I promise you I'll take you to him soon."

These words seemed to calm down the tall Winchester. The next second, though, a new question came. "Why are you doing this? Taking care of my brother, I mean."

The sheriff smiled and leaned on his chair, again motioning for Sam to sit just this time Sam accepted the offer. "You don't remember me, of course. Last time I saw you, I think you were four, five years old. Your family is old friend of mine's. Your father helped us a long time ago. We'll be eternally grateful for what your family did to us."

"But if you don't see us in such a long time, how did you know Dean was coming here and how did you recognized him. Our father is not with us, and well, Dean changed a lot in the last eighteen years."

The sheriff didn't look like he was pleased with the direction their conversation was about to take. "Well, I didn't see you in 18 years give it or take, but we saw your father and Dean a few times in the last few years."

"They came here to help your family again?"

Scott sighed before explaining, "No, they came here looking for help."

* * *

Dean looked around. He was in the middle of a forest, high trees surrounding him, a heavy atmosphere making it hard to breath. He looked for a way out, a path to follow but there was none.

"Dad! Dad! I can't do it alone! I can't!"

Looking up the older Winchester could see the sunlight fighting to come through the trees, but they were dense. Dean fell down on his knees, his body trembling, he was cold. Suddenly, he heard the sound of branches being moved and looked up to see Sam staring down at him.

"Sam?" Before Dean could say any other word, Sam turned and walked away from his big brother. Dean fell to the ground feeling an unbearable pain in his chest. His sight went dark and he felt it. He knew it was it. That was the end.

"Dean?" A soft voice penetrated in his mind. Was he dead already? Was it in heaven? He was pretty sure there would be a huge fight before his final destination was decided. "Dean," the voice said again, as he felt a hand running through his short dark blond hair. Opening his eyes, he managed to smile. "Hey!" Breathing in relief, Dean realized, "I thought I was dead."

"Sorry to break it to you, but you're still stuck in the world of the living."

Dean smiled and relaxed again under the covers. "These are great news." Then, as an afterthought, he asked, "How long I've been here?" The dark haired woman who was talking to him sat at the foot of Dean's bed, "half a day."

"Is Sammy here?"

"No, I believe he is in the hotel. Don't worry. Now, I'll be right back, you need to eat something."

When she left the young man alone, he sighed. It was good to have someone taking care of him, but he needed to find Sam. It was his duty to take care of his brother.

Tbc.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimers: see first chapter.

AN: Thank you all for the wonderful reviews for this and to my other story, "Nightmare". I'm sorry if my writing is a 'little' confusing. It is hard to write in a foreign language – and no, I don't do drafts in my own language, because I find impossible to do that. I just need to take the idea out of my mind.

I think I better say that this is set before Home, and therefore, before Asylum. I would place it a little after Skin.

Well, I guess that's it. I think I'm answering some questions here and also offering some glimpses of what's going on/what's wrong with Dean.

Thank you all again! Please, continue reviewing and pointing the direction.

Happy Thanksgiving!

**The truth lies behind the mask**

Chapter 3

Sam was forced to wait while Sheriff Curtis gave some instructions and signed some papers. He wanted to see his brother, be able to see for himself that his Dean was okay. He remembered how he had left Dean with that high fever that was beginning to worry him. He didn't want to leave his oldest sibling alone, but it was necessary, and he tried to be as quick as possible. Well, he wasn't quick enough.

Soon Sam and the sheriff were on their way to where Dean was. Sam thought it was a hospital at first, but when they actually passed by the hospital and continued straight ahead, he decided to ask again where his brother was. The man sighed but finally answered, "I'm my house", as he parked the car in front of a typical suburban house, with a small garden in front of it. The lights were off from what Sam could see except for one small light in one room on the second floor. Sam figured that was where Dean was.

Sam quickly followed the older man to the main entrance and waited on the hall while the man turned on the light but apparently he wasn't in a hurry to do that. The Winchester boy was sure he saw a shadow passing by before the sheriff finally turned on the lights. Sam cursed under his breath – what if it was a trick and he just took the bait? He was sure Dean would kick his ass a million times for being so naïve. He was standing in the middle of the now clear living room while Scott unloaded his gun and locked it on a drawer. Right at that moment a girl emerged from what Sam supposed was the kitchen holding a cup.

"Hi, Dad. How was your day?" The girl said before Sam could react.

"It was okay. Listen, …"

"This is Sam, right," the sheriff's daughter asked without turning to any of the men's sides.

"Yeah, nice to meet you, miss…" Sam extended his hand but was stunned when she didn't react at first. Then, the moment she turned on his direction Sam understood. The girl was blind.

"Caitlin," she finally completed for him as she noticed Sam had suddenly lost his voice. "For a Winchester, I'd expect more than to be freaked by a blind girl." She took a deep breath to compose herself. Sam was truly ashamed; he didn't know why he had reacted that way.

"Pity, that's what you felt. I know. I don't mind." Caitlin was still staring at Sam's direction, and although he knew she wasn't actually seeing him he felt being scrutinized by the brunette in front of him. "You came here for Dean, he is resting now. He took the medicine the doctor prescribed him and now he is resting." Then, she turned to her father's direction and explained, "We were right. It's the same thing, Dad. At least he was smart enough to come to us this time."

"What are you talking about," Sam asked not liking the fact that he was sure she was talking about his brother and letting him out.

"I'll explain later. Now I'm gonna get your brother to eat something. Excuse me." Sam motioned to follow her but her father shook his head 'no'.

"I told you your brother was fine. Cate is taking care of him. Now, why don't we go check what we have for dinner?" Scott led Sam to the kitchen and started checking around to see what they were going to eat.

00000

Later, Caitlin was back on the main floor. She moved to the kitchen but her father stopped her, "everything is in its place, sweetie. Please, have a seat."

"Thanks, Dad."

Sam observed the interaction between father and daughter and felt a pang of jealousy hitting him. That was how he wanted his family to be like, how he wanted his life to be light.

"Jealous? Of me? You gotta be kidding." The voice of the girl sitting with them at the dinner table took Sam out of his wonderings.

"What? No! How?" The young Winchester didn't know how to react. Then after a beat, he asked, "do you have telepathy." The girl placed a cocky smile on her face, something that he would swear she learned with his brother if she wasn't blind. Well, maybe she wasn't back when the families met.

"Caitlin doesn't read minds," the girl's father explained, "She reads emotions."

"I'm an empath; your father figured it out. Otherwise I would probably be locked in an asylum thinking that my emotions were more messed up than any other normally messed up child," she finished with a sad smile, and Sam wondered what his family came to do there almost twenty years before.

The sheriff moved the conversation to light subjects. Whatever happened in the past, Sam figured, obviously was painful by the look he saw in the old man. Sam imagined how hard it was for the man to deal with whatever happened to his family if he couldn't even hide his feelings from his daughter. Sam wondered if Caitlin's blindness had anything to do with her gift. If so, he wondered if he was going be handicapped since he was developing an undesired gift of his own.

"You worry too much," the voice of Caitlin startled him. Damn, Sam thought; that was weird.

"Do you know what I am worried about?"

"Nope, but I can sense it. I can block you out, you know, if I want," the young girl observed, "but I'm afraid you can't block me. But I mean no harm; you don't need to worry about this, at least."

"Yeah, that's true." Came a voice from the stairs. Sam stood up when he saw his brother slowly climbing down the stairs and walking to the room. Dean kissed the top of Caitlin's head and took the vacant seat on the table.

"You should be in bed, Dean Winchester," the fatherly voice of Scott Curtis filled the room.

"Sorry, Scott, but I couldn't resist." Dean grinned and turned to his baby brother.

"No, Dean. Dad is right; you should go back to bed." Caitlin said while she lifted up from her seat. She extended her hand and waited for Dean to take it. She knew it worked all the time. Soon, Dean took her hand and they walked back to the second floor, not without the girl scolding the oldest of the Winchester's men there, "you still have fever, Mr. Winchester. Do you want to be stuck on that bed for exactly how long? A new born turtle is stronger than you right now and you know that." They climbed up the stairs teasing at each other and Sam amused the whole interaction.

"They're really close, huh?" Sam asked the sheriff.

"Yeah," the sheriff seemed to be lost in his own world, "Dean helped her a lot after…" the man trailed off, and before it really rose to the surface, controlled his emotions. He turned to Sam and smiled, "so, you saw your brother. Do you want to go back to the hotel or would you like to stay with us?"

Sam was grateful for the offer; he finally began to realize that his brother was indeed in good hands. "Thanks. Is there a spare bed in the room Dean is?"

"Yeah, but you can't stay there for now."

"Why?" Sam raised his dark eyebrows.

"Because Caitlin is treating Dean, and they need to be alone."

To be continued


	4. Chapter 4

**AN**: Hey, I'm back! I'm sorry for those who are waiting for the next chapter of Nightmare, it is ready – in my mind, but I didn't have time to write it down yet. And remember, please, before you get upset with me, Nightmare is a tragedy, okay?

Well, we finally get into business in this chapter, which means some of your questions will be answered. This was an easy chapter to write because, well, the whole story started in this chapter and the next.

**Thanks**: Thank you all for your wonderful feedback. I love knowing what you think of what I write. So, please, keep them coming. I just realized that this story, or better saying, Caitlin line of work, was inspired by some events on a fiction by **Teal Lover**. All her fictions are wonderful, by the way. If you're a **Chris Halliwell** fan, you shouldn't miss them.

I was thinking, what about a crossover between Supernatural and Smallville? These guys are all from Kansas, right: Just tossing an idea around.

I guess that's all… Hiatus sucks, by the way, and I can't wait to see what the next Supernatural episode will be. Although it is supposedly Faith, I wouldn't be surprised if it was Scarecrow instead. It fits way better. Okay, enough rambling.

I hope you all enjoy.

Warnings and Disclaimers can be found on chapter 1

**The truth lies behind the mask**

Chapter 4

It was really late when Sam, who was supposedly sleeping on the couch, heard footsteps coming from upstairs. He waited, still laying on his back, to see who was going to cross the room, and wishing that hopefully it was his brother. Scott had reassured him that Dean was fine before going to bed but the fact that he couldn't go in the room where his brother was still bothered the youngest Winchester brother.

"Wanna make me company?" A soft voice asked in the middle of the darkness, startling Sam.

"How did you know I was awake?" Sam was beginning to feel uncomfortable around that girl, no matter how close she was to Dean.

"I was sneaking on you," Caitlin defended herself, "but there is this level of worry that a person can't reach while sleeping." She had stopped and waited. "So, will you keep me company or what?" Sam rose to his feet and followed the blind girl to the kitchen. "Tea," she asked while motioning fluently thought the space. Sam couldn't stop wondering how it would be like to not be able to see.

"Here, let me help you," Sam offered, but the brunette girl took a step back. "No, I'm cool." Sam raised an eyebrow and stared intently at her. She had to be Dean's friend, always trying to prove her independency. Sam, however, wasn't in the mood for that, and gently took the boiler from the girl's hands, "Seriously, this is the least I can do. You're helping my brother, right? So, let me do something nice for you." Caitlin was about to protest but she felt he was being honest, and Sam was indeed a gentle person, at least from what she could feel and from what Dean told her, although she also knew that part of him acting like that was because she was handicapped. But then again, she was used to it already.

They waited in silence for the boiling water, each one of them taking a seat by the counter. Sam was curious about that girl, how she seemed to know his brother so well, and most shocking, how his family had not only accepted help from them but even turn to them when they needed it.

When the tea was finally ready, their mugs were filled and Caitlin picked some toasts to them, Sam felt at ease to speak.

"I guess you're really good at it," Sam said matter of factly. Cate raised her eyebrows in apparent confusion, "what do you mean?"

Sam smiled at her, and then remembered that she couldn't see it and felt somehow embarrassed. "I mean, you create the atmosphere, you know, to make people feel safe and comfortable around you." Dean's baby brother cracked a smile again as he noticed the girl sitting across from him twisting her lips as if she was considering what he just said. "It's a gift," she stated finally, then laughed. "No, seriously, I got lots of practice. People don't know how to act around me, and I'm just a normal person."

"Normal?" Sam's tone of voice was amused.

"Okay, wrong choice of words. But I'm as close to normal as I'm allowed to be." The girl paused, and then added, "Just like you."

"Yeah, right." Sam could almost hear his brother snorting at the girl's remark. "So, how's my brother? What's wrong with him?" Sam decided to move to a more pressing issue.

Caitlin seemed distracted, running her finger around her mug. "You know some illnesses are related to the emotional, right?" She took a long breath before continuing, "Let's just say this is my area of expertise. People come to me when they're ill but nothing seems to help them, although apparently the problem is simple, like a migraine, or cold, or, don't know, a cut that doesn't close or doesn't stop bleeding."

Sam was staring intently at the girl in front of him, his brother's friend, someone outside the family that Dean actually trusted. "Your bother had this illness around three years ago, you were in college then, and your father did all he could to help Dean. From what he told us, he took him to every single doctor he knew and trusted, but although they could diagnose the illness, no treatment helped him."

"So, anyway, a family in this town was having some house issues, if you know what I mean, and Dad mentioned your family to them. The fact was we didn't hear from you in a long time, so we didn't know if you were still on business or not, but my Dad used his contacts and reached your father. To cut this long part of the story short, your father and your brother came here and helped the family in distress. But the thing was, Dean was not in his best shape. Dad convinced your father to stay with us and let me try to help Dean. Your brother is stubborn as a mule, but I knew him, I remembered him and believe it or not, he remembered me. It was hard but I was able to help him deal with his issues back then and he was finally able to heal. Dean likes to keep things for himself, but there is only too much a person can handle before falling apart. Your brother doesn't fall apart like most of us mortals do, but it hit him pretty hard," she added, and took a sip of her tea. They stayed again in silence. Caitlin knew she had to let all that information settle in Sam's mind. She knew what would be the next question, a question she couldn't answer.

The young Winchester ran his h ands through his longish dark hair trying to absorb what he just heard. First time Dean got seriously ill was around the same time he left home for college. Well, it kind of made sense, although he never realized how much his absence had hurt his big brother. From what he heard from the sheriff, John and Dean had come there again other times, probably because of the same problem. And probably because Sam was not there for Dean. Then it hit him, and Caitlin knew it was coming, "what about now? What drove Dean to that state? I heard you saying to your father that it is the same thing as before. I've been with Dean day and night for the past few months. I can't see what is causing him so much emotional pain."

Caitlin bit her lower lip and Sam noticed. She had to control herself now to not split everything in the boy's face. She might be blind, but God that kid was dumb. But she controlled herself. She couldn't tell Sam what she knew. She worked with Dean so he could be able to face what was hurting and bothering him and let his body heal, but she couldn't do more than that. She would never do anything to hurt her friend.

Sighing, the 26 year old girl placed her mug in the sing and walked to the doorway. "Sam, it is pretty late, why don't you try and get some sleep? If you need us, we are right here."

Sam painfully realized that the girl avoided answering his question and wondered if he was the reason his brother was ill. Again.

To be continued


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimers: Still not mine.

A/N: Sorry for the delay. I hope you enjoy this. I'll try to update next chapter soon. Remember this story is un-betaed.

Thanks for your lovely reviews. Feedback is always appreciated.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

**The truth lies behind the mask**

**Chapter 5**

The morning was cloudy and the sun didn't have chance to show its light. Sam found himself with nothing to do but wait, and he wasn't even allowed to go see Dean. The sheriff had left early that morning, and Caitlin came downstairs only to get Dean's breakfast. The youngest of the Winchesters wanted to go out, do something, anything, but it started to rain and he found himself trapped. Worse, the weather was beginning to affect his mood.

The boy found himself pacing in these strangers living room, and feeling more and more uneasy. He didn't understand why he couldn't go see his brother, why they were doing that to Sam? Sam needed Dean, he needed his brother near him to be sure everything was fine; everything was going to be alright. Darn, he simply needed Dean.

Getting tired of waiting alone, Sam climbed the stairs and looked around, finding three doors. Well, his brother might be behind one of them. He barely took a few steps towards the corridor Caitlin appeared from one of the rooms, tense and obviously irritated. She closed the door behind her and walked steadily in Sam's direction. Se stopped in what she sensed was a good distance from him and all but yelled, "What's the problem with you? Why can't you do what was asked? Why couldn't you wait?" Sam was startled by the outburst and took a step back. The young man could see that the girl was shaking, he brow covered with sweat.

"I just…" Sam tried.

"Downstairs, now!"

Sam saw the girl running a hand on her head, a tired sigh leaving her lips and did as he was asked. He thought Caitlin was going to return to Dean's room but he was surprised to hear her footsteps behind him. When they finally reached the first floor, Sam tried to apologize but the answer he received left him stunned.

"You're always apologizing, aren't you? But did you ever mean that? Are you really sorry?" Kate ran her fingers through her hair, trying to control herself. Sam's timing was one of the worst she ever seen, he had decided to step upstairs when she was right in the middle of her session with Dean and was forced to break the connection. "You know I asked you to not go upstairs for a reason, right? You just put my life at risk there! Damn, you put your brother's life at risk and that Samuel Winchester I can't afford."

"Well," Sam said after finally finding his voice, "if you at least tell me what is going on, let me see my brother, than I'd be more comfortable and less worried, you know?"

"So," Caitlin tried to control herself. For an empath, she surely needed to work her own emotions, Sam thought, "what do you want to know," the girl finally asked.

"For once, what is wrong with my brother?"

Caitlin took few deep breaths and was finally in control of her emotions again. "Sam, I'm sorry but I can't tell you. This is not up to me. Whatever Dean's problem is, he is the one who decides who should know and when. But I can tell you why he had a crisis now. You don't know your brother, Sam," she sat tired on the couch and Sam followed her. "Did you ever stop to think how's your brother life is? What he has to face, what he wishes he'd have but can't?"

The girl waited for an answer but she knew she wasn't going to get any so she continued. "You keep complaining about wanting a normal life, and how everything is wrong, and how your lives are so messed up and that Dean doesn't understand. But he does, Sam, can't you see it? That's one of the things that hurt Dean the most. He knows deep inside how a normal life is, what its taste is, but he can't have it anymore. He lives everyday with the knowledge of how it could have been, how it should have been, and everything he lost that day in the fire, when your mother died. He knows how it felt to have his mother's love, her attention. It is all imprinted in him, but he tries to ignore, tries to hide his good memories, and you know why? Because you don't have them. You don't know how your family was back then, and he can't give you that, so he prefers to bury it than to have something he can't offer you." Sam could notice Caitlin's hands shaking as she continued. "All you do is complain and tell him that he doesn't understand. But did you ever stopped to understand your brother, the pain that he carries?"

"But he doesn't talk to me," Sam tried. The boy found himself wishing he hadn't insisted in knowing the reasons.

"I know. Dean doesn't talk to anyone. But there are something that are said without actually been said. You just need to pay attention. Did you ever asked yourself any of these questions? Did you ever stopped to think about any of these? Dean spent his life making sure that you were happy, you were safe and alive. He couldn't give you what he once had but he gave you the best he could and I know you appreciate him, but I don't think you ever really let him know that."

"He doesn't do chick flick moments."

"Sometimes we don't need the words," the young girl finally said, resting her tired head against the sofa. Her hands had stopped shaking, but her face was still covered in sweat.

"What happened? Do you need me to do something for you?" Sam was worried.

"I'll be fine. You know, there was one reason why I asked you not to go there. Usually, you would have to leave us alone just during the sessions, but do you realize how confused and wild your emotions are lately? So add your turmoil to your brother's turmoil and heck, there is only too much I can handle."

Sam was confused, "I thought you said you could block me."

"Here, now, yes. But upstairs I have to be open to Dean, to know when he needs me. That's why I can't have you two close to each other. And when you stepped upstairs a little ago, and Dean and I were 'working', God, I… Let's just say I'm glad I don't have all my senses otherwise I just… I don't know."

"I'm sorry," Sam said again and was happy that Caitlin was blind, because he was blushing incredibly in shame. To his surprise, she finally smiled.

"Now, you meant it. See? It is not that difficult, is it?"

Caitlin rose to her feet and turned to go upstairs and this time Sam didn't follow her.

"Sam," Caitlin called the young Winchester's attention, "if you two behave I think you'll be able to share a room tonight." And with that, she turned back to Sam's big brother.

To be continued


End file.
